HOW TO OVERCOME ANGER.

Living in the cut-throat, fierce and ruthless world, anger is one of the common issue people face.Anger is also known as wrath or rage, Rage is an intense emotional state and it is not something which is gathered overnight. It doesn’t start abruptly out of a circumstances or habit, but it is a response to collection of negative information in our heart. When a situation arises knowingly or unknowingly, it triggers a part of the brain response which lead to different behaviourally attitude such as crying, weeping or going crazy (throwing things, hurting themselves).

Intense anger mostly outburst in the form of tears. Usually crying is an expression of sadness, if that is so, then why people cry when they get angry? Well, People carry both negative and positive information in their heart.

Some circumstances in life are out of control and may lead to vigorous outburst or disproportionate reaction. One trigger leads to another for example: - Parents frustrated by colleagues and expressing it towards children, teachers taking out their personal frustration on children.

Now let’s take a look on How to overcome it. Most people take a resolution on anger, but that not an effective way. System has to be transformed in a different way for a different outcome.

Let’s look into this step by step. 

Point 1 – ACKNOWLEDGEMENT: - Cast your ego and check the reality. Acknowledging your anger issues and accepting it will help you to understand and work on it better. Denial of the same leads to unchangeable situation.

Point 2 – MINDSET: - Take out the mindset that you cannot change and it really does not matter how many times you fail.  Keep approaching it in different ways and the Best way is to remove the negative image, the pain that you carry in your heart. Openness to accept the situation with positive mindset is the Key. 

Point 3 – REWIND: - Stop and rethink to know the cause. It may not have begun with the current situation but the inception, maybe from some negative info/influence that affected you in the past. E.g. Boss yelled at you at office and when you are back home you are invited with your kid’s mischievous behaviour, you may yell at them. Probably they may be waiting for your presence to enjoy but you may outburst because of the negative emotions you got from your boss. Unexpected brokenness in your family, broken heart, hateful word, news, something that has hurt you in the past, and something that took peace out of your heart, everything leads to the outcry. What you carry is important and where you are carrying is more important. Situation you face in life mounts up the emotion.

Point 4- RELEASE: - Learn to let it go. Thing which are worthless and unprofitable, why do we need to carry it? Best thing is the liberation of the feelings. E.g. someone deceived or hurt you but why we should keep the bitterness or revenge in our heart? Release and disconnect it and you will be able to move forward. Learn to realise the negative emotions that you carry by taking out all the hooks and throwing it deep into the oceans and never look for it again. Personally what I did was to burn out the thing that affected me.

Point 5 – ANALYSE: - Not able to realise those negative emotions? Do an analysis. E.g. If your heart is broken, start taking care and give time to heal it. Console yourself the same way you console your friends or close ones. It will help you to heal your heart. Ask God to help you out and fill it with joy and peace.

POINT 6 - GROW: - Best way to grow is to forgive those who hurt you and start accepting the reality. Grow beyond the situation and let the situation not control you. Grow and it will lead you to accept the things. E.g. If you give 2 kg of weight to 2-year-old kid, he won’t be able to lift it. The same kid can easily lift that when he is of 10-15 years old. The same way if you grow in a situation, thing won’t seem to be that big or tough. GROW BEYOND THAT PERSON or SITUATION THAT CONTROLS YOU.

In addition, if a 3-year-old kid hurts you, you won’t hurt him back, even if you get hurt, you won’t take it seriously because you know he has not done it intentionally. Same way, consider that the person has not grown to understand you or the situation you are in. You should have a matured mentality to accept their mistake and forgive which reveals your level of growth and capacity. Don’t engage with a frustrated person and keep a positive attitude that they may be angry because of some circumstances. The attitude of not easily getting provoked and to grow beyond that situation makes you come out of the anger and therefore doesn’t impact your life anymore.

Jesus lead the life same way. He forgave the people who crucified him and asked heavenly father to show mercy by saying “Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do” - Luke 23:34. Keep the same attitude and you won’t be provoked easily. Next thing- don’t react to the situation, reaction and response is totally different. Reaction means a voluntary, natural reply to an action. E.g. pricking a thorn. Response means understanding the situation and deciding how you wanted to deal with it. Hold on, think how to respond, take decision.

Whether you in positive or negative circumstances, anger or deflected mood, take little time to understand for the conclusion and it may lead to success in many situations. 

Ultimately, the real point is what you carry, it will come out. Fill yourself with positive thoughts and emotions. Omit the negative things from your heart. Don’t ponder on past negative experiences, overthinking can influence our mood. Filter out the things you need in your life.

Share you smile and happiness with the angry and frustrated people and start sharing positivity around yourself.